o r

"N O T     M Y     H E A D ! ! !"

a   m a r a t h o n    o f
r o m a n     d e b a u c h


by Kallisti & Mordantia Bat

Drinking games abound. Many popular cult TV series or movies have such games associated with them. While we here at S.i.H. are perfectly capable of drinking through the wee hours without having to resort to any gimmicks or games, we nevertheless accidentally concocted such a game during an "I, Claudius" video marathon. This game must be shared. Not because it's a particularly brilliant game -- after all, drinking games hinge on the simple concept that when an oft-repeated thread, catchphrase, gesture, or whatnot appears on screen, one drinks. Simple. To the point.

But, no, the reason we must share this game is (1) it was damn fun; and (2) we feel it is our duty here at S.i.H. to disseminate (and sometimes merrily decimate) historical and literary examples which evoke that certain essence du "suffering is hip." And, surely, you must agree those wacky Romans knew how to suffer hiply.

Our marathon "I, Claudius" fest was held on two separate Saturdays -- watching Augustus through Tiberius on the first day and watching Caligula through Claudius the second. In between these Saturdays, Kallisti happened to mention wistfully to her affable co-workers her happy anticipation of the upcoming conclusion to the marathon and she explained our drinking game.

Some of the co-workers were baffled. Scornful, even. "I don't get it. Are you guys ex-English majors or something and this is how you get your kicks?"

Well, actually, that isn't too far off the mark.

But still. Let us explain MORE. Perhaps our little minds are so twisted that it befuddled us that people actually thought we were a bit "off" in reveling so in such a magnificent series. We couldn't conceive why anyone wouldn't find the humor in such tidbits as:

  • Livia. ("I want to be a goddess.")
  • The figs.
  • Caligula's Dance of the Dawn.
  • "Not my head!!!!!!!!!!!!"
  • And many, many others.

Anyway, Kallisti says her co-workers didn't understand because they're all young hip urban techno-nerds and just didn't get the fun of "I, Claudius." Well, we're all techno-nerds, too, but -- well -- we've got this bent, obviously, for the literary and the historical, the dark and the twisted. We know the regular readers of S.i.H. do as well, so it is for y'all that we feel the need to further share the highlights of our two-day marathon with you.

But we will ever-so-politely offer you the dagger first. CLICK HERE to continue.


I, Claudius
Also on VHS:
I, Claudius

I, Claudius

By Robert Graves

Claudius the God

By Robert Graves