New Orleans’ Little Instruction Book




Index
Nos. 1–25 Nos. 26–50 Nos. 51–75 Nos. 76–100 Nos. 101–125
Nos. 126–150 Nos. 151–175 Nos. 176–200 Nos. 201–225 Nos. 226–250
Nos. 251–275 Nos. 276–300 Nos. 301–325 Nos. 326–350 Nos. 351–375
Nos. 376–400 Nos. 401–425 Nos. 426–450 Nos. 451–475 Nos. 476–511






51.
Take out the garbage without being told ’cause I’m sick of doing it!
  52.
Avoid overexposure to the sun.
  53.
Vote. Revolt.
  54.
Surprise loved ones with little unexpected gifts dead things.
  55.
Stop blaming others. Take responsibility for every area of your life.
(I can’t change this one.)

  56.
Never mention being on a diet methadone.
  57.
Make the best of bad situations weird liqueurs in the cabinet.
  58.
Always accept an outstretched hand string-free fuck.
  59.
Live so that when your children think of fairness, caring and integrity, they think of your parents.
  60.
Admit youre mistakes fabulous.
  61.
Ask someone to pick up your mail and daily papers when you’re out of town. Those are the first two things potential burglars stoners look for.
  62.
Use your wit to amuse, not abuse.
  63.
Remember that all American news is biased bullshit.
  64.
Take a photography course, it’ll last longer.
  65.
Let people pull in front of you when you’re stopped in traffic horny.
  66.
(For Rock City Morgue…)
Support a high school glam rock band.
  67.
Demand excellence and be willing to pay for it eschew mediocrity.
  68.
Be brave. Even if you’re not, pretend to be. No one can tell the differencet.
  69.
Whistle the Andy Griffith theme to deliberately vex people.
  70.
Hug children after your disciplinees them.
  71.
Learn to make do something beautiful with your hands hair.
  72.
Give to charity friends all the clothes you haven’t worn during the past three years can’t fit into any more.
  73.
Never forget your anniversary cigarettes.
  74.
Eat prunes when dizzy.
  75.
Ride a Lock your bike.

Nos. 26–50   Nos. 76–100


“Suffering is Hip” Table of Malcontents