New Orleans’ Little Instruction Book




Index
Nos. 1–25 Nos. 26–50 Nos. 51–75 Nos. 76–100 Nos. 101–125
Nos. 126–150 Nos. 151–175 Nos. 176–200 Nos. 201–225 Nos. 226–250
Nos. 251–275 Nos. 276–300 Nos. 301–325 Nos. 326–350 Nos. 351–375
Nos. 376–400 Nos. 401–425 Nos. 426–450 Nos. 451–475 Nos. 476–511






276.
Patronize locals merchants even if it costs a bit more.
  277.
Fill your gas tank when it falls below one quarter full the attendant is not looking.
  278.
Don’t expect money to bring you happiness.
  279.
Never snap your fingers in ‘Z’ formation to get someone’s attention. It’s rude tired.
  280.
No matter how dire the proposed situation, keep your cool spare change. That smelly panhandler doesn’t really need 42¢ for ‘the bus’.
  281.
When paying cash, ask for a compact discount, complement the clerk on his/her facial piercings.
  282.
Find a good t
railor.
  283.
Don’t use a toothpick ion the public area.
  284.
Never
underestimate your power to change yourself.
  285.
Never overestimate your power to change others.
  286.
Practice empathy polygamy. Try to see things from other people’s point of view.
  287.
Promise? big. Deliver big Yah, right.
  288.
Discipline yourself to save have some money. It’s essential to success drink.
  289.
Get and stay in shape away from Bourbon Street.
  290.
Find some other way of proving your manhood than by shooting defenseless animals and birds whipping out your cock on the corner of St. Ann and Bourbon Streets.
  291.
Remember the deal’s not done until the check has cleared the bank baggie has been licked clean.
  292.
Don’t burn bridges. You’ll be surprised how many times you have to cross the same river call the landlord to get anything done.
  293.
Don’t spread yourself too thin legs for just anyone. Learn to say no politely and quickly.
  294.
Keep giving overhead low.
  295.
Keep expectations high.
  296.
Accept pain and disappointment as part of life goth culture.
  297.
Remember that a successful marriage depends on two things: (1) finding the right person sex and (2) being the right person lots of booze.
  298.
See problems one night stands as opportunities for growth and self-mastery.
  299.
Don’t believe people when they ask you to be honest with them.
  300.
Don’t expect life to be fair go on much longer.

Nos. 251–275   Nos. 301–325


“Suffering is Hip” Table of Malcontents