About the Author of
GETTING ORGANIZED ON CELLELOFRATES

 

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

An Autobiography of David A. Ross

I was born and raised in St. Paul and played baseball, wrestled and eventually graduated with a degree in history from the University of Minnesota. During college, I worked part time and joined the Army Reserves. After completing my enlistment, I was honorably discharged as a first lieutenant. I was then hired as a salesman and transferred to New York City. Upon arrival, I found a car at LaGuardia Airport waiting for me with instructions to head to Mt. Kisco. While admiring the sights and not paying attention, I pulled into the middle of the Whitestone Bridge's tollway without any change or clue. I got out and walked to the tollbooth for change, while a million angry motorists hollered and honked their horns at me. Welcome to New York! In no time, I had a handle on the city and fell in love with Yankee Stadium where I could go and pretend to live out my boyhood dreams. I eventually discovered Wall Street and realized that if those guys could do it, so could I. After I got my series seven license, I realized that being a broker is kind of like being an elite telemarketer. I soon returned to Minnesota and in no time at all, was nestled in a vine-infested mansion, driving a BMW, sailing and had an entourage of lovely ladies who hoped I might be "the one." Then, one day I went insane and told everyone, "I want to be a writer." They always say a fool and his money are soon parted and sure enough, I found myself impoverished, dateless, and surrounded by rejection slips. On the bright side, my friends told me, "But Dave, you're a better person now," as my faith returned. In striving to become a writer, I have suffered an enormous opportunity cost. Based on my previous earnings and what the market has done since I left the business, I probably walked away from a million dollars worth of income. Although I could have retired by now and be basking in the life of leisure I was bred for, I console myself that I'm a better person. To lessen the blow, I've surrounded myself with brilliant mentors, take classes, work diligently and read nonstop. I work in sales until the day hopefully comes when I can write all the time. My hobbies and interests include chess, rollerblading, biking, theology, photography, reading, and traveling.

My publishing experience is limited to about ninety credits. I've listed thirty-one of them with a complete listing upon request.


  1. West Virginia's Help Won't Be Forgotten - Huntington Herald Dispatch -May 20, 2002

  2. Stopping the Steamroller - Smile - Winter 2001-2002

  3. Getting Lost in the Shuffle - Northern Stars Magazine - May/June 2001

  4. 2 Big Fat People - Mar-Apr 2001 - Poetry Protocol - p

  5. Winner of the Poetry Forum Chapbook Contest - February 2001

  6. Trying to Look Smart - The Plowman - 2000 vol. No. 11
    issue No. 1

  7. A Slight Oversight - Thalia: Studies in Literary Humor, Department of English, University of Ottawa, Canada - Winter 2001

  8. Harry Potter and the King James Bible - Mystical Rose - Oct 2000
  9. Candidate Gore is all talk, no action - Huntington Herald-Dispatch - Sept 2000

  10. Telemarketing - Poetry Protocol - March 2000

  11. The Eighteenth Prophet - Voices From the Well / Karawane- March 2000

  12. A book review on A Restless Flame by Louis de Wohl - Mystical Rose - May 2000

  13. Getting Worked Up Over Nothing - Born Magazine, - June 2000

  14. A Life In Sales - Writer's Exchange - Issue #48, Summer 2000

  15. An Unforgettable Election - The Scroll - March 2000

  16. The Postcard - Smile -winter 2000

  17. Publishing Credits - The Storyteller - Oct 2000

  18. Tricky - Fantasque - Issue no. #5 - Jan- 2000.-s

  19. Cellelofrates Saves Earth's Animals - Scroll Publications - Fall 1999

  20. A book review on Barabbas by Par Lagerkquist - BookLovers - August 1999

  21. The Tree Cutters - Sept 99 in the book - The Unbroken Circle

  22. The Car Won't Start - Nov, Dec 1999 - Guild & Poetry Protocol

  23. The Critic - Northern Stars Magazine - November 1999

  24. 24. Linear Misanthrope - Short Stories Bimonthly June 1999

  25. The Power of Three Letters - Rockhurst Review 1999 - A Fine Arts Journal - Dept of English, Jesuit College of Kansas City. Annual Issue

  26. Playing Roulette on Cellelofrates-Faydraw- June 1999

  27. The Deer Hunter-The Storyteller-Sept. 1999

  28. The Public Figure-Quill Books, in their book A Time to be Free, June 1999

  29. The Skeleton In The Closet- London Fog-Dec 1998

  30. Women's Breast Cancer on Cellelofrates- Atrocity Sig of Mensa- winter 98 -s

  31. The Astronaut Orbiting Cellelofrates- Fayrdraw-September 1998